Valentine’s Day can be a depressing working day when you’re in an unsatisfied or shaky marriage. In every store or advertisement you see romantic cards, heart-shaped boxes of candy, or choose jewellery for the special lover’s working day.

Dining establishments publish their special menus in advance and give food items names this kind of as &quotlover’s delight chocolate dessert.&quot Radio stations sponsor contests centered around the concept of Valentine’s Day, and newspapers operate pictures and stories about spouses with lengthy marriages.Everywhere you flip, you are bombarded with pictures and stories of happy lovers.

What can you do to survive Valentine’s Day when you are concerned sick that your marriage is on the rocks? How do you deal with all the love hoopla when your spouse does not know if he or she truly loves you or wants to remain married?

The subsequent 7 tips will assist you to keep your point of view and sanity:

1. Be your very own valentine this yr and celebrate the wonderful person that you are. Make an appointment to have a massage or pedicure on Valentine’s Day as a existing to your self. Or make plans with a friend to dine at a gourmet restaurant both on Valentine’s Day or the working day prior to. Buy your self a new CD or guide that you have been seeking. Depart work early, if possible, and do something enjoyable this kind of as going to a movie in the center of the work afternoon.

two. Make a dedication to love your self and to treat your self with treatment and respect. Resolve to consider great treatment of your self by working out, consuming correct, taking time to unwind and see friends, and obtaining enough rest. Toss any martyr tendencies out the window and make your health and wellbeing a leading priority. This is not becoming selfish. If you do not nurture your self first, you won’t be in any shape to give quality energy and time to your marriage.

three. Commit to becoming okay no matter what occurs in your marriage. It is essential that you make your self a promise that you’ll have a quality existence with or without your spouse. By showing respect for your self and belief in your ability to thrive whether or not married or not, you’ll be coming from a location of empowerment and power. The attributes of personal power and confidence attract others and engender respect, generating you a more desirable partner.

four. Take uncertainty and see it as an opportunity to flex your faith muscle tissue, build resiliency, and create the self-discipline to reside in the existing minute as much as possible. With practice, you can learn to curb your tendency to be concerned about the future and can expand more of your energy into generating the most of the time you have now. Everyone has periods of time when everything is up in the air and how issues will flip out is unknown. And as poet Walt Whitman reminds us, &quotThe future is no more uncertain than the existing.&quot

five. Practice having enjoyable, even when you’re feeling miserable! Don’t wait around till your existence is perfect to strategy enjoyable activities. Do something that you have needed to do but have put off. You may have said to your self, &quotOne working day I am going to consider piano lessons.&quot Now is the time to get started. Make a checklist of issues that you’d enjoy doing and pick one to put on your routine. 1 of the greatest mistakes you can make is to wait around and see what occurs in your marriage prior to you consider steps to produce a more satisfying existence. The time to begin enjoying existence is now.

6. Broaden your assistance circle. Remain in touch with your friends, even though your first impulse might be to withdraw when you’re feeling blue. Appear for ways to increase your get in touch with with others this kind of as taking a night class, going hiking with a local hiking group, or attending services at your church, synagogue, or mosque. Don’t allow concern of questions keep you at house. You can be discrete and give a response this kind of as, &quotI cannot get into it, but I enjoy your caring and concern so very much. Thank you.&quot

seven. Find your powerful woman or powerful guy warrior energy. Go rappelling, learn to scuba dive, trip in a hot air balloon, attempt para-sailing, strategy a backpacking trip, go horseback riding, lift weights, discover river rafting, dance around a campfire, sing potent songs, or signal up for a martial arts class. Do whatever empowers you and make you really feel powerful and energetic. Stretch out of your convenience zone and surprise your self by doing something different. Then congratulate your self for your spunk.

Tips adapted from the guide Keep Your Marriage: What To Do When Your Spouse Says &quotI do not love you any longer!&quot by Nancy J. Wasson, Ph.D. and Lee Hefner. Available only at http://www.KeepYourMarriage.com , exactly where you can also signal up for the totally free Keep Your Marriage Internet Journal. Get in touch with Nancy at Nancy@KeepYourMarriage.com.